Boy With Curious Sentences

Here, for your amusement, is one single sentence from David Foster Wallace. It’s from the short story “Luckily the Account Representative Knew CPR.” [The Account Representative] administered CPR, beating at the soft dent of a chest’s breastbone, alternating quartered beatings with infusions of breath down through the senior striken executive’s full but faintly blue lips [...]

Michael Dell Owes me $72.99

So, awesome: a lightning storm stole my megahurtz last night. And fried my motherboard in the process. Wish I were in Dublin with a broken heart. There’s a strong possibility that when the replacement does arrive, it won’t work. Or it’ll work, but my memory will be shot too. Bad news comes in threes, so [...]

Halfbeard’s Inane Weekend Moralizing

Jehovah-Jireh… God will provide. Do you believe it? I went to a friend’s wedding this weekend in Willoughby, Ohio. The number of bachelors I know is dwindling steadily. My sister, en route to a wedding in Warren, took me to the NE outskirts of Akron so I could hitch the rest of the way. I [...]

Part-Time Hitchhiking For Fun And Profit

I’m back in Columbus again after a weekend in Cleveland/Sandusky for Dan Gifford’s wedding. I hitched a bit both ways for a total of about 100 miles. The rest via rides with Katie, Kraig, and Brenton. I will do a trip report tomorrow since I’m too exhausted tonight. Here’s some Douglas Coupland (from Life After [...]

The Gospel from Outer Space

Back to our regularly scheduled programming. Here’s an excerpt from Slaughterhouse-Five by the inimitable Kurt Vonnegut: …The visitor from outer space made a serious study of Christianity, to learn, if he could, why Christians found it so easy to be cruel. He concluded that at least part of the trouble was slipshod storytelling in the [...]

You Shall Know My Velocity!

Wwwho’s in Ssseattle? THIS GUY. I arrived at 10.10am yesterday via a Spokane-Seattle Amtrak train and was completely FUBAR. For brevity’s sake I won’t explain, but it did involve paramedics (one of them suspiciously Luke Seelye-esque), vomiting, and a minor panic attack. After medication and a 3-hour nap at Bryce Bahler’s house, things turned around and [...]

Big City Blues

Hi friends, Halfbeard the Barbarian checking in from a public library in Spokane, Washington. I arrived at a rest stop last night ~1.30am Pacific time and have essentially not slept for 36 hours (save for several cat naps when I holed up in a single-occupancy, lockable handicapped restroom to escape the cold). June 3rd I woke up [...]